6 Mental Moves to Reset After A Stressful Day

Hi Mummis,

My last post gave you six body areas that store stress and the literal moves you can use to help your body come back to center.

But sometimes it’s not your body that needs the reset. It’s your mind.

These are six mental shifts I personally use (often!) to feel more grounded, functional, and less stressed as a mom.

A quick note before we begin:
Like anything, these work best when practiced in small moments throughout the week. That way your brain knows how to access them when stress is high.

1. Casting the Gratitude Net

This is my favorite mental shift.

When I’m stressed, I can get stuck in a negative thought spiral. Gratitude interrupts that cycle and shifts you back into your thinking brain.

Research shows gratitude activates the prefrontal cortex — the part of the brain responsible for emotional regulation — which helps break rumination and calm the nervous system.

Where you start depends on how overwhelmed you feel.
If life feels heavy, cast your gratitude net out wide:

• I’m grateful I can see.

• I’m grateful I’m alive.

• I’m grateful my kids are safe.

Then slowly bring the net closer to your actual life by making each gratitude more specific and personal. Keep going until you start to feel loving and calm.

(Think: the Grinch when his heart grew three sizes.)

2. “I Am on Vacation”

When you’re overwhelmed and need a tiny reset, say it in a way your kids get.

I started this during COVID when I was a newly single mom working from home, navigating two kids in online school, a divorce, my home was on the market so constant house showings, the list goes on... I was stressed.

When I needed a ten-minute breather, I’d tell my kids, “I’m going on vacation.”
They understood a vacation is a place you rest and recharge — even if I was still physically in the room.

If my youngest forgot, I’d smile and say, “I’m on vacation right now.”

A quick note: this isn’t a break to ruminate.
Use your “vacation” to breathe, ground, splash water on your face, or journal. Anything that brings your system down.

3. Get Outside

Nature is one of the fastest ways to reset your nervous system.

Even a quick walk around the block, a few minutes in the sun, or parking to watch the sunset can shift your entire emotional state.

Studies show that spending just 10 minutes in nature lowers cortisol. Pairing that with bilateral movement (like walking or jogging) calms both sides of the brain at once, making the reset even stronger.

It doesn’t have to be a workout.
Just step outside, breathe, and let nature do what it does best.

4. Old Lady On The Couch

This is not my idea but it’s powerful.

It comes from an interview with Jake Muise (Maui Nui Venison) and Tim Ferriss. Jake describes his wife using this tool in challenging parenting moments. She imagines herself as an old woman whose kids are grown and gone. She misses them deeply. On her birthday, she’s granted one wish: to time-travel back to their childhood again! But this exact moment, exactly as it is.

Maybe the kids are whining, fighting, or refusing to put on shoes.

But suddenly, none of that matters.
She’s just grateful for this version of them.

This works because it uses cognitive reappraisal- a technique shown to reduce amygdala activation and increase feelings of connection.

Try it.
It instantly shifts frustration into tenderness.

5. Journal + Locus of Control

Writing down what’s weighing on you helps lighten the load.

A journaling exercise I love:

1. Brain dump everything that’s stressing you.

2. Next to each item, write what part of it is within your influence.

3. Note what’s not in your control. Now ask yourself, is there really nothing you can change? Even if it's just your perception of the situation, that can really help.

This connects to a concept called locus of control:

• Internal locus: You believe your actions influence your outcomes.

• External locus: You feel life happens to you.

Research shows that naming what’s in your control reduces emotional overload and helps shift you back into problem-solving mode.

This exercise gently returns you to a place of personal power.

6. Admit Where You Are

Some days you’re just tapped out.

No mental shift is going to fix it. And that’s okay.

Your loved ones can handle the truth.
Tell them (in age-appropriate language) what they can expect from you right now.

Note: This won’t work with infants or toddlers. In those moments, asking a partner, friend, or family member for support is usually the better option.

But for older kids, spouses, co-workers, or friends, you can say:

• “I’ve had a rough day. I need some quiet.”

• “I’m not my usual self tonight, but I’ll be back soon.”

Sometimes I’d even tell my kids:

“I’m feeling really stressed. If your arguing continues, you may get a version of me you don’t like.”

It’s not perfect, but it’s honest.
Giving them a heads up that I may not respond calmly if things escalate feels more fair than erupting into yelling without warning.

Naming your emotional state supports co-regulation.
Children feel calmer when the adults around them are clear, not confusing.

Letting your loved ones see you as a whole human is not weakness.
It models resilience.
They learn emotional recovery by watching you do it.

These mental shifts may look simple, but they’re surprisingly powerful.
Use them often, practice them before you need them, and notice how your capacity expands over time.

To make this even easier, I created a free 6-Step Mental Reset Checklist you can download on our website. Keep it on your phone, your bathroom mirror, or in your journal for quick access.

If you want deeper coaching around stress, overwhelm, or the emotional load of motherhood, the Burnout Recovery Course is the best next step. It’s designed to help you rebuild your baseline, stabilize your nervous system, and feel like yourself again.

You deserve a life that feels steady.

Hope you are having a wonderful holiday season,

Sam